In this episode, Anne Muhlethaler, host of Out of the Clouds, interviews Cameron Silver. Known as ‘the impresario of vintage fashion’, Silver - who pursued acting in his teens - is a talented retailer, storyteller, and an all-round entertaining guest.
In their interview, he tells Anne about how he landed working in retail while pursuing acting and singing roles, and how he started building a shop in his mother’s living room, after discovering a passion for thrifting while touring around the US. Later, he founded the now famous vintage couture boutique Decades Inc. in LA, where he started to dress celebrities and stylish clients for red carpet and other assorted events.
Cameron’s passion for the history of fashion is linked to the fact that he believes that ‘fashion is a barometer for how we live, have lived and will live.’ Himself a daring dresser, he tells Anne about style, self-expression and how much he enjoys mentoring emerging designers and consulting for brands.
The two end on discussing the difficult times Cameron went through when, in the middle of the pandemic, he found himself caring for his ailing father, Jack B Silver, who passed away later in 2020. Cameron shares with both great vulnerability and kindness and in the middle of that, manages to impart some wonderful wisdom.
A beautiful, touching and very funny interview. Happy listening!
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Selected links from the episode
You can find Cameron via his website https://cameronsilver.com/ and on Twitter and on Instagram @cameronsilver
You can find out more about his store is Decades Inc https://decadesinc.com/
His book is Decades, A century of Fashion
We talk about what is a Bimah https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/bimah/
Fred Segal https://www.fredsegal.com/
Ron Herman https://www.ronherman.com/
Annie Hall, the movie https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annie_Hall
Elsa Klensch https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elsa_Klensch
Weimar cabaret https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weimar_culture
Kurt Weill https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurt_Weill
Friedrich Hollaender - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friedrich_Hollaender
Tiffany Haddish wearing her white dress, again https://people.com/style/tiffany-haddish-rewears-alexander-mcqueen-dress-2021-beautiful-issue/
Cameron interviewed for WWD - https://wwd.com/fashion-news/fashion-features/cameron-silver-fashion-talks-on-instagram-live-1203556749/
Cameron interview with the LA Times - https://www.latimes.com/fashion/alltherage/la-ig-decades-20121121-story.html
Ennio Capasa of Costume National - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ennio_Capasa
Nardi Venetian jewelers - https://www.nardi-venezia.com/
Sage & Madison - https://sageandmadison.com/
Diana Rilov - https://www.instagram.com/dianarilov/?hl=en
The Mysteries of Pittsburg book - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16697.The_Mysteries_of_Pittsburgh
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Anne Muhlethaler:
Hi. Hello. Bonjour and namaste. This is Out of The Cloud, a podcast at the crossroads between business and mindfulness. And I'm your host Anne Muhlethaler. Today I am delighted to be joined by fashion visionary, Cameron Silver, the owner of legendary store Decades on Melrose in Los Angeles was introduced to me back in the days I was in London and still working for Kristin Luoto. I remember being put through on the phone to Cameron, as he was trying to get his hands on Christian Louboutin fluo pink satin lace-ups, the Freds that had just graced one of the first men's shoes that we'd ever done. I found a pair for him and later on flew to Los Angeles while I was visiting my friend, Melissa, who also had made the introduction. And so we filled our friendship after he took me what I would call event hopping one evening and then feeding me a chopped salad. Very LA style.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Now Cameron's had many adventures since he started his career picking couture and vintage treasures for his boutique and dressing many academy award winners in vintage on the red carpet. In this conversation, I ask Cameron about his origin story. We talk about service, retail, couture. We talk about his book, his TV show on Bravo and his most recent Instagram series called candid Cameron, which I absolutely adore. He also told me with great vulnerability about losing himself for a while in 2020 after his father passed away. Cameron's legendary sense of humor really lit up my day when we did this interview. I hope it will have a similar effect on yours as you listen to this interview. Enjoy. Cameron, thank you so much for being here. Welcome to Out of The Clouds.
Cameron Silver:
Well thank you. It's good to be here. So we are out of the clouds, not in the clouds?
Anne Muhlethaler:
We're out of the clouds.
Cameron Silver:
I guess that's better than being in the clouds.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I think so too.
Cameron Silver:
Is it? Okay?
Anne Muhlethaler:
I think so too. I like to think of when the sun breaks through the clouds, that's kind of the light analogy I like to play with.
Cameron Silver:
I like that. Well, help me see the light.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Well today you are going to help us see the light. Well, I wanted to play off the welcome to the Bima, but I just thought that this would be lost on too many people unless you want to start by explaining it to us.
Cameron Silver:
Well, so I do this silly thing called candid Cameron, which is a Instagram live when I'm traveling and meeting new people. And I have this spiel called come to the Bima and the Bima is where, when you're at a Jewish temple, it's like where the Torah would be. And it's an honor to sit on the Bima. If the kid's having a Bar Mitzvah, they get to sit on the Bima. I don't know how it started, actually it started in Hawaii, but it's like a thing now. I mean, I actually wear a little bracelet, a pearl bracelet that says Bima on it.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's so brilliant.
Cameron Silver:
But the best thing is when someone has no clue, I'm like, "Come to the Bima." And they're like, "What's Bima?" Which is the majority of people. But then when you explain it, it's like a pulpit, it's just another way of saying a place of honor.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's wonderful. Welcome to the stage.
Cameron Silver:
Thank you. It's good to be on your Bima.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I like to start all of the interviews inviting my guests to basically tell our listeners who you are, where you come from, the full story really.
Cameron Silver:
Well, I'm from Mars. Have you had anyone from Mars yet?
Anne Muhlethaler:
No, you're literally my number one.
Cameron Silver:
OK. My name is Cameron Silver. I owned a store in LA called Decades for 25 years, which is one of the original luxury vintage couture boutique. And I'm on Melrose between Placentia and Crescent Heights. I grew up in Los Angeles, Beverly Hills, and have worked in fashion in some degree since I was 15 or 16 so for nearly 40 years, which is really scary. And I've also worked as a luxury brand consultant and ambassador for brands and creative consultant. And I love fashion because I think it's a barometer for how we lived and lived and will live.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Thank you. That's a beautiful introduction. When did you get attracted to fashion? Do you have a memory, anything specific?
Cameron Silver:
There actually is a specific moment that ironically happened a block and a half east of where my store is today. My store is a block and a half west of what was Fred Segal on Melrose and Crescent Heights. Now it's called Ron Herman, but when I was nine or 10 years old, I was obsessed with the movie, Annie Hall. Now let me preface this. I'm an only child and it was cheaper for my parents to take me to the movies when they wanted to see something as an underage than get a babysitter. I saw a lot of adult films as a child, but Annie Hall, for some reason, the tutorial look of Diane Keaton really impressed me. I had a little straw hat on and a vest with an undone tie, rolled up white sleeve shirt and baggy khakis as this precocious nine or 10-year-old.
Cameron Silver:
And I was with my parents at Fred Segal and every sales associate was like, "Who are you?" They just thought I was the cutest thing ever. So I recognized that fashion could draw people to you and write the fourth wall. That was probably my initial moment. And then years later, I worked at Fred Segal when I was in high school and then now have a business, a block and a half west of that landmark. But that was probably a pivotal thing, but I also remember, and a lot of young people don't know this experience of hearing the September Vogue and bizarre drop into the mailbox because my mother would get it. And that was the first time you were seeing clothes or watching Style with Elsa Klensch on a Saturday morning with my parents. My parents were both into fashion and shopping and discovery.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's such a beautiful story and what a classic look Annie Hall. When did you know you wanted to work in fashion? Was this on the cards when you were a teenager?
Cameron Silver:
No, it was really not the plan. I'm supposed to be really famous. I got recruited in high school as a sophomore in high school to UCLA as an actor. So I knew I would get guaranteed admission to UCLA and I just assumed I'd get out of college and just be a legend, but that didn't necessarily happen. I had always worked retail and actually in college I took a year off. I was working at a store called Theodore, which was at that time they had a location in the Beverly Center and this is 1990. It's the height of Mugler, and Dolce getting really big and Kenzo's having a moment. Biblos, all of these great, great brands. And I was making really good money for a 20-year-old so I took a year off. And I loved the theater of retail because it's very, very similar to anyone who is in a service industry or interfacing with the public, it really is all media and entertainment and infotainment. That planted a seed, but really, I still never thought I would be in retail jail at nearly 53.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's so interesting. Retail jail. I wanted to ask you, what kind of actor were you and how did that inform your sales performance?
Cameron Silver:
I was very good at classical. I was good with Shakespeare, more difficult roles like the fool and King Lear, which was always kind of because I'm quite tall but I would often get cast in these roles that were very presentational observers, but not as emotionally connected. I guess I was not that emotionally connected. I exceeded in that. And then I also ended up becoming an interpreter of Weimar cabaret of twenties and thirties music so Kurt Weill and Friedrich Hollaender.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Oh, wow.
Cameron Silver:
Again, very presentational, very third person observation. At that time I was recycling old songs and I actually ended up doing an album in the mid-nineties and I was touring around the country looking for men's clothes, vintage clothes, just because I would be in a concert setting for a couple nights or a theater setting for two weeks. There's no irony loss in the fact that I recycled old songs and now I recycle old clothes. Had I been a more emotionally connected 20 something, I probably would've exceeded as an actor, but it had to take a few nervous breakdowns to feel anything.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. Fair enough. I appreciate the fact that you started in retail so early in the fact that you're coding a theater. I'd love to know where storytelling became something that you used in your selling technique.
Cameron Silver:
Well, as a performer, I was always storytelling. Whether it was singing a song written in 1930 in Berlin or singing Cole Porter. I always knew to get to engage with someone you can't sell, it's always storytelling. And this is in every aspect of life, no matter what you do, the hard sell is not necessarily the most effective means. As a storyteller, sometimes it's engaging in conversation. And I'd say particularly at this time, as we slowly get through this pandemic a year ago yesterday, I did my a first event in Boulder, Colorado and women and men came to meet me and I did a book signing and did a mini trunk show. And they were emotional to be in a store again after being locked down for practically a year. And they just wanted a visceral connection. When I talk about storytelling, it's not only telling the story, but it's listening to someone else's story.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. That resonates with me a lot. And I think that whenever we open ourselves to having a conversation with someone and to listen to someone else, we can make connections anywhere, any place and suddenly retail is a great place of opportunity for that in particular.
Cameron Silver:
Completely.
Anne Muhlethaler:
And so how did Decades happen?
Cameron Silver:
So it's the mid-nineties, I'm performing everywhere from a mostly lesbian bowling alley in Minneapolis to being a guest at Town Hall in New York City and all these places I'm going, I am looking for vintage clothes. I'm looking for men's YSL suits or a Pucci tie or a little Courrèges coat, just anything interesting because when you're a singer, my instrument had to be protected. It's not like I could go out and have a wild night out on the town. I really had to make sure my instrument was protected. And it's very nice to sort of just go into a thrift store. I do love storytelling, but sometimes I don't want anyone to tell me a story, but I found that I learned a lot about cities by what they give away. I was thrifting and I started finding a lot of women's clothing and suddenly I was sending things to my parents and all of a sudden, they had a living room filled with racks of clothes and a store was born and I was driving and soft four lease sign on Melrose avenue, at the building I'm in now.
Cameron Silver:
And it had several failed business. It's an art deco building from 1926. It's a very attractive building from the exterior. And I was able to lease a quarter of it but the leasing agent was like, "Don't this, it's like everyone has failed." I mean, I own the building now. It was good timing. This was 1997. Vintage was just percolating as being more socially acceptable. Celebrities were just starting to pay attention to the red carpet and branding. And I was a novelty. I was a 27-year-old guy who wasn't like, "That shit crazy." Who wasn't an interloper because most of the people in the vintage world are pretty weird. I didn't want to wear any of the clothes so it wasn't like I was trying to hoard things for myself and within a short period of time, the store had buzz.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's wonderful. I love the fact that you transformed your parents' living room into a stall. That just said-
Cameron Silver:
I mean, my mother is still a pack rat. That living room had a Chickering piano and a Steinway. I mean, it just was not really a functional room anyways.
Anne Muhlethaler:
You just got me at this time. Okay. Now, around that time and correct me if that's not the case, you became quite known as a celebrity stylist. You started to put some of these amazing vintage pieces on actors and actresses on the red carpet. How did that come about?
Cameron Silver:
Well, in 1997, 1998, 1999 stars shop themselves. The stylist system had not really solidified. It was not unusual to have Gwyneth Paltrow pop in or Renee Zellweger or Winona Ryder. It's like people just would come in the store and because my only agenda was to help you look good I became a nice resource because vintage was a means to differentiate yourself from everybody else. And as more brands started to get into the red carpet dressing game, there still was something quite wonderful about, oh, I bought this dress. Sometimes it was almost easier for a celebrity just to come into the store, like Marisa Tomei, and just buy a dress rather than work with a team to find her a free dress.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I could see that. Also probably a little bit more fun for her, I would imagine.
Cameron Silver:
Well, that's the thing. I was always a safe place for people to visit and I would style people, officially style people for Oscars and things like that. I love real people. I love celebrities. I like skinny people. I like curvy people. I like tall. I just love the magic of the match. But I do you think people really like going into a store sometimes, do it themselves. And I think as the stylist system has become such a machine and there's so much pay for play, it's the joy of dressing has been lost.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. And the way you describe the clothes that you curates in your store, it also sounds like there's an element of finding a treasure, uncovering a treasure somewhere.
Cameron Silver:
Exactly.
Anne Muhlethaler:
And getting the gold because you know it's a one off, you know nobody else is going to get their hands on that.
Cameron Silver:
That's the beauty, and it's ownership. I always say I like owners not loaners. I understand it's bond to borrow something. And if you have the opportunity to wear something, but if you're going to the Oscars or a momentous moment, own that dress, own the memory. I think the circular economy is fantastic. I love the idea of pre-loved and recycling, but I think the greenest way to dress is to own something and wear it over and over again. And I think that's real style. I have been very enthusiastic about celebrities publicly wearing things over and over again, because that's how we all need to dress. You can rent the runway left and right but it's not the greenest thing. There's so much dry cleaning and back and forth going. Just buy something you love and style it.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I agree. You're making me think of Tiffany Haddish. When she first came out with her first couple of big successes had, I think it was a McQueen dress.
Cameron Silver:
Yeah, a white McQueen.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Exactly, that white McQueen and she was like, "I am going to worry everywhere." And I thought that was wonderful. And that really made her stand out to me in many ways.
Cameron Silver:
I think it helped propel her fame because it became such a story. And then when Cate Blanchett went to can and Elizabeth Stewart, her amazing stylist, and my dear friend started to rework those pieces, that's what I hope becomes a bigger movement. And I think for retailers, it's very valuable. If you can communicate to your client who's investing a lot of money in luxury fashion just saying, "No, no, no, you're going to wear this again, but you're going to wear it this way next time or we're going to add a jacket or you'll put it away for a year, but it's going to come back. We're going to wear it for this event."
Anne Muhlethaler:
Is that where the thrill is for you to work with people over and over again?
Cameron Silver:
Oh, for sure. I'm not interested in a one night stand. I'm a long term relationship. We get married. You come to Decades, it's serious. And it's actually really true because so many of my great clients have become great friends and we travel together. The kids grow up with me. It's a really beautiful thing. And I'm not just a source. You don't come to Decades just to shop at decades. It's really about the world I can bring you into. It's about, if you're interested in buying Haute couture, I can take you to Paris. I have those relationships. If you love Dolce & Gabbana and you're interested in procuring Alta Moda, your very expensive exquisite clothing, I'm that person to take you there. If you want to know the best theater to see in New York, I'm like a concierge for people, this person who can help ... I always say that I help really rich people spend their money better.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That is a lovely way to describe what you do.
Cameron Silver:
And it's not just really rich people. Someone comes into the store and they're visiting from out of town. I always tell my staff, I want them to leave happier than when they came in. And even if they don't buy anything, give them a moment and if they have a question, recommend a restaurant, get a cup of coffee over at this place, give people insider information.
Anne Muhlethaler:
It's interesting. I was going to quote something that I read Booth Moore was saying about you at the LA Times a few years ago. She called you a vintage clothing impresario, which I thought was a really interesting terminology. And suddenly you become the spokesperson for the fashion that you're curating. And I would love to hear, when did you become attracted to couture? How did you discover it?
Cameron Silver:
Well, in thrifting, there were times when you could actually find a Dior for 54 at a thrift store. I remember, it was a 54 Dior. I forgot who bought it, but those days are long gone. It just doesn't exist anymore. Everyone knows the value of their clothing or knows that their clothes can't have a secondary life. I think Booth was very spot on about it, impresario. As far as couture, I was very lucky that my lovely friend, Susan Kazden, she and her husband Allen took me to the couture shows. I don't know if it was for the first time, I think I had gone sort of peripherally in the past, just because it was always around the men's shows and I was consulting for brands, but it was really going with a client and seeing the process and a good client and someone who has extraordinary taste. It did wet my appetite and it taught me a lot about the art form and that it's very regimented. Buying couture is not easy.
Cameron Silver:
It's a lot of work. It's a lot of fittings. I have a really great friend who I took to couture once. And this was when Laquan was still designing and she bought a jacket and I said, "You're the laziest couture client. That needs another fitting, it's too big." It requires a commitment, not just financially, but time wise. And because you're spending a lot of money, you have to be smart with how you curate what you're getting. And I've helped people purchase these pieces of wearable art to make sure that they're curating a collection because it's a big mistake if you buy something stupid and we've all done that.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah, not couture. That's very interesting. I heard you say earlier, and you mentioned this as well in the same article with Booth, that you have a fancy life, but that you go everywhere and you dress every size and you've never been age phobic. And you were mentioning that you were working with a woman in her early seventies in San Francisco and you called yourself the united nations of fashion.
Cameron Silver:
I am totally the united nations of fashion in several ways. I have traveled around the world. I've been through a Hezbollah checkpoint in Lebanon. I went to Riyadh years before it was getting trendy to go to Saudi Arabia. I went to Kiev right after the revolution. I've always used fashion to bring people together. And the woman in San Francisco just wanted to shop with me. And it was such a fun memory because she had really cool style. I mean, she's probably in her, now she's probably 80. And she actually sent me a text the other day saying, "Remember that day we went shopping." Because she insisted on buying me something and I was like, "No, you don't have to buy me anything. It's my pleasure to do this."
Cameron Silver:
But she brought me a really nice Valentino suit because it brought her joy. She only had a daughter. She wished she had had a son. I love older people so much. I love younger people. I mean last night I had dinner with these six, mostly 24-year-olds and it's, I want to say relevant. And I also want to be educated by people younger than me and people older than me. And I want to be around people smarter than me, but I'm generally the funniest anywhere in any environment.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I think that probably is true of most situations.
Cameron Silver:
People often ask me, why do you get to fly private so much? I said, "Well, I'm funny. People want me on their airplane." Which doesn't sound very green. But I don't have kids so I can do whatever I want.
Anne Muhlethaler:
There you go. You mentioned consulting a couple of times over the course of our conversation already. When did brands started to approach you to work for them?
Cameron Silver:
Well, within about a year, as the store became a really popular destination where literally fashion designers would get off the plane and come straight to Decades. One of the first gig I really had was with Costume National and I think '98 at the height of Costume National, which was doing this slim suit really a little bit before Tom Brown and didn't get credit. And Ennio Capasa wanted to open a store in LA. And I remember I was in Paris and the phone rings and they said, "We want to open a store, but we'll only do it if you help us." Because I think they realized that I was a good, honest person. And I mean, that was an interesting gig because I found the real estate. I found the architects, I did the buy, I hired the staff. I did the opening event.
Cameron Silver:
I did the after party and that led to other gigs. Since Costume National, I've worked with Boucheron, Samsonite, Nine West, Azzaro, Pringle, Loro Piana, Hermès, all of these unique projects. And then for five years I was associated exclusively with Halston. Now that I'm emancipated from that, the gigs are coming in. But ironic, this is a weird thing Anne, every brand that's approaching me is sleepy brand who needs to get their DNA injected with some energy, which is my favorite thing to do is work with a sleepy brand that has a great DNA that sometimes the people within the brand can't see the light, but I can see what's cool or sexy about it.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. There's a lot of energy coming from you and I could see how a sleepy brand would need behind your eye, your expertise, your know-how, that energy as well. For some reason, it just brought up the title of that film, Stella Got Her Groove Back.
Cameron Silver:
I can help brands with that. I'm not the youngest person, I'm not some 20 TikToker, but I have the relationships with the stores. I know all of the independent stores. I know most of the fashion directors of department stores. I know most of the editors. I know most of the stylists. I know a lot of the celebrities plus I know my fashion history. I'm very useful. And then a lot of these brands have to build archives. So they bring me on to sort of help with building the archive, which then helps inform the new collection because I always say, use your DNA or lose your DNA. And there's always another designer who's going to see what's in your history, is going to come to Decades and shop and buy the inspiration. That's really fun to help a brand. I mean, most creative directors at a brand, they know the historic DNA of their brand, but sometimes you got to just really own it and figure out how you can morph it into something else.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I love that saying, use your DNA or lose your DNA. I will remember that.
Cameron Silver:
Well, I always say use your DNA or lose your DNA because Michael Kors will take it. I mean, I don't mean that in a disparaging way to Michael Kors at all, but I'm using Michael just as an example. Another designer is going to be able to use what you want to be part of your DNA and own it. It's so interesting with a brand like Balmain whose current incarnation really has nothing to do with its historic DNA other than embellishment is part of the Balmain DNA. But I can look at Balmain and see, okay, I can see where that comes from and those big gold buttons remind me of that brand. And now it seems like it's part of the Balmain DNA.
Anne Muhlethaler:
You're right. He really established that over its reputation as well to get the message and the design recognized by clients and press like.
Cameron Silver:
It's like politics or anything. You say it over and over again or dictatorship and people believe it. And it's the same thing with a brand.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Over the course of your career, you have been on TV a lot. Tell me where I'm wrong.
Cameron Silver:
Yes. I have done a lot of guest appearances as a fashion authority for all of those cable and Good Morning America. And I did a TV show for Bravo, which I always say I survived a Bravo show. And interestingly enough, there's a new TV project brewing right now, which maybe will finally be with producers who know what to do with me and don't try to turn me to someone I'm not because I don't want to be a Bravo Liberty. I mean, I don't think people are dumb and I think we dumb down TV so much. I want to do something that elevates people, but still entertaining. We'll see what happens with that. But I have done a lot of TV but of course now I just have candid Cameron and all six viewers on my Instagram.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I was going to come to that. I fell in love with it. So I don't spend enough time on Instagram for someone in my field of work. But I love what I discovered. Can you tell us how you created candid Cameron and what can people expect if they decide to go to your archive on your Instagram?
Cameron Silver:
Candid Cameron is just the idea of interviewing people primarily in the fashion world. And my talent is something that Howard Stern is good at doing, although he does it much better, is I can disarm someone and get people to be revealing or silly, for example Alberto Nardi, one of the great Venetian jewelers, aristocratic, a Venetian family, but I was able to disarm him to bring a silliness out of him and his mother who happened to be there. I just enjoy interviewing people and there is a little bit of a commerce aspect of it because then people DM me and want to buy things. Sometimes it's not a full on Instagram live. Sometimes it's just a couple posts in my stories, but it can generate a significant amount of business, which is shocking in the most unsophisticated way off my iPhone. I just ordered a three pack mic thing so the sound quality will be better in the future, but it's not very sophisticated what I do.
Cameron Silver:
And maybe that's why it works because it's kind of raw and honest and it's not overproduced. And I make the subjects become a little bit more interesting because vulnerability is powerful. And if I can make someone seem a little more vulnerable, I'm not saying crying on cue, but that's what I do. And then the DMs flood in and suddenly like, oh my God, my show is making more money. Probably has a bigger net profit with a zero overhead than an hour of QVC.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's unbelievable. But I have to tell you, I completely agree with you because yesterday, so I watched several episodes, but I loved the one you did in Red Hook. You made me laugh so much.
Cameron Silver:
Oh, in Red Hook in Brooklyn.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Oh my God, what did you call it?
Cameron Silver:
Bum fuck Brooklyn. It was so far away.
Anne Muhlethaler:
So funny. I have been to Red Hook. I know where this is, but the store was gorgeous and these people, the vintage fabrics.
Cameron Silver:
It's really cool what they do. I also love giving someone a little exposure, someone emerging but I'm now trying to scale it into a more professional way, not just on the candid camera and format, but working on something with the more established multi-channel retail media company, different from the TV show I was talking about. So we're filming something in New York on the 14th with a certain academy award nominated actress and will be discussing her clothes, which will be sold to benefit the actors fund.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Oh, beautiful.
Cameron Silver:
We're going to take that technique and that sort of storytelling. I think it's a little like 12 minutes. It's like people have such a short attention span. I'm learning shorter is better and it is incredible how much business can be generated with the most unsophisticated production.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. But see, I trust your eye. And so I know that whichever candid Cameron I check out, I'm going to be interested whether that's the ceramics in the Four Seasons in Lisbon or the Nardi. Oh, by the way you called yourself Cameroni d’Argento. I was at this fancy restaurant in Geneva last night and I was laughing so hard. You have no idea. I was waiting for someone.
Cameron Silver:
Interestingly enough with Mr. Nardi, we had so much business after that Instagram that I proposed to Mr. Nardi. Why don't you give me a cartel of Nardi to sell in America? Americans are not traveling to Venice. We have done a lot of business together, a significant amount out of money that I'm sure if any major, like if Tiffany knew how much business I have done off of that simple Instagram live, you don't have to pay me Beyonce dollars.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Don't say that. Take it back.
Cameron Silver:
I can move a lot of inventory and more importantly, and this is something where I can tell the story of Nardi to people who may know the name, but may not be that familiar with it. People just want authenticity. They want to learn. Nobody wants to feel dumb. They want to feel smarter. They want to laugh. I mean, we've been through a pandemic for over ... We're into its third year. This is bullshit. We want to have fun. We thought it would be like the roaring twenties by now. It's not the roaring twenties yet, but I have faith.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I'm glad you do because the other day I read in an article on Highsnobiety that they've nicknamed the dreadful twenties. I hope that Highsnobiety will be proven wrong.
Cameron Silver:
I mean, we're only two years into the twenties.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I know. I forgot to ask you, how did you find the name Decades? Where is the inspiration from?
Cameron Silver:
It just sort of came to me. I initially really focused on the sixties and seventies when the store opened. Because my whole thing with vintage is that it has to look modern. I don't care if it's Edwardian, it has to look modern. The name Decades, I think I was again just driving and the name came to me. For somebody who doesn't like to drive, although I'm a native Angelino for a lot of people who drive a lot, that sort of when a lot of the light bulb thinking happens sometimes. And that's how the name came. I've trademarked and I've got to sue some store in Palm Springs that's trying to use the name decades.
Cameron Silver:
I mean, it's just all been fortuitous timing. The store opened at the right time. I am forever grateful to Richard Buckley, the great editor and Tom Ford's partner who passed away, who found the store and really helped connect a lot of dots for me. And I never exploited that with people, but I would go to Paris and Richard took me to the flea market and taught me about furniture and just was so instrumental. And that had Tom come into the store who then invited Lisa Eisner and then it was Ronnie Sassoon and all of these people who really embraced what I was doing.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's beautiful. And so in 2012, Decades became the name of your book as well.
Cameron Silver:
Yes. Thank God I wrote that book that came out the same time of my horrible TV show. The book came out in 2012 and it still gets printed. I am giving a speech on Tuesday in Sarasota related to the book.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I saw that, amazing.
Cameron Silver:
I was lucky that Bloomsbury publishes the book and as the book was getting conceived, they were very clear that this is going to be a perennial. And they wanted a book with depth, not a fluffy fashion history book. We're in its third printing. I assume there will be a fourth. I should probably write a new book, but books are hard. It takes so much time, especially coffee table hybrid essay books. The book was great. The first printing blew out. Dita Von Teese was at my opening, the launch dinner. It was so chic. It was Dita Von Teese and Marisa Tomei, Kristin Davis was just such a chic group of women who have inspired me. And I'm still friends with all of those great women.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Oh, that's wonderful. I was wondering a decade on, sorry, because obviously I'm using the word decade. What does it mean to you to have created that book and that legacy for your store and also an owed as impresario of vintage fashion to the clothes that you love.
Cameron Silver:
I'm really proud of the book. And it was a long process and my incredible friend and writer with me, Rebecca Deliberto, we had a really beautiful process of writing it and adjusting it, but it really is my legacy at this point, this book, that's why there has to be printings until the day I die! But three or four days ago they were screening the Pierre Cardin film somewhere. And they reached out to me to comment about it at some university. And the guy who reached out is now I think an associate professor, but 10 years ago he said, "God, your book has been such a reference for me all through his academic journey." And that's what I really wanted to do. I wanted to write a book that was personal and it's done in first person, which is unusual for this type of book.
Cameron Silver:
It's attractive, it's beautiful enough for a coffee table. But I said, I wanted it to have enough Robert Kors that it could be in a locker or a library. And I'm thrilled that it's you used as a reference by so many academics and fashion lovers, plus it matches every room in the house because it's a multicolor cover. I'm proud of it. I really do want to write another book and probably not fashion based book. I'd like to write about my family, my crazy family life. I'm not regimented enough. I need a military boss to say, "Okay, you got to write for two hours." That's what I need.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I hear writing is very difficult. I don't think it's just you, but I appreciate that. I hope that you do write a book about your family.
Cameron Silver:
Oh, it's going to be good. I mean, I went to a crazy first half of the pandemic.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's awesome.
Cameron Silver:
Yeah.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Recently, I was obviously looking through your Instagram and I loved when I read that you schlept the Marabou DG to Aspen, which you can explain to people what it stands for.
Cameron Silver:
Yes.
Anne Muhlethaler:
And I wanted to say, you're pretty daring with your personal style. And I was wondering if you could speak to what it means to you to be able to dress following your instinct and what that means in terms of personal expression.
Cameron Silver:
I mean, I really like to play dress up probably to the chagrin of my boyfriend, but when I'm in Texas, I'm wearing a cowboy hat and boots and fringe. I mean, I out-tex in the Texans. When I'm in Saudi Arabia, I dress so traditionally that people just assumed I was Syrian because I'm tall and lighter skinned and grew out the beard and they'd speak to me in Arabic. I'm like, "No, I'm a nice Jewish boy from Beverly Hills," but the schlepping of the Marabou feather coat. I have a very close relationship with Dolce & Gabbana and Juicy who Dominico's niece had seen a little Instagram of me wearing this white Marabou feather coat to the floor and she's like, "You have to have that. You have to have it." I brought it. Schlepping is a Yiddish term to what's-
Anne Muhlethaler:
I'm familiar with it. Schlepping is bringing something bulky with you.
Cameron Silver:
Yeah. It's like going to Aspen gay ski week, which was the gayest thing I've ever done. I was like, "Whoa, that was a lot of guys." But there was a white party. So I brought the white Marabou feather. It's to the floor. It's like Marlene Dietrich Marabou feather coat and wore it to the white party. And it was a sensation. And it's like, if I want to play dress up, I'm already planning my outfits for Telluride Palm Beach is all going to be Terry cloth. It's all little Terry cloth, blazers and Espadrilles, which I have to find because half my stuff is in storage because I'm living like a nomad. But I do think it's fun to play dress up. And when I was doing Olsen for five years, I was a little bit more conservative. It would be like a turtleneck and a blazer.
Cameron Silver:
And then sometimes I would wear a good Louis Vuitton, a fun shoe, but in general I was a little bit more subdued and I'm sure I look better more subdued. Classic is usually better for everybody, but I like to have fun and I'm enjoying eccentricity again. It would be easier if I could get rid of my belly just to fit into stuff, but it's just fun to play dress up. And I think that I like authentic eccentricity. I do not like manufactured eccentricity. I have the people who go to fashion week and just want to get photographs. I can't deal with that. But when it's to the core of my bones and I don't take it like I'm not that over the top, but it's fun.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. I agree with you. And I'm wearing today my most feathery outfit.
Cameron Silver:
I know. I like the sleeves. What is that?
Anne Muhlethaler:
It's a Drise sweater that was just for winter.
Cameron Silver:
I love Dries.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I love Dries (van Noten). And I could have bought the black with the Navy feathers, but that I thought that was boring. Red feathers-
Cameron Silver:
I'm doing a popup in Telluride. I mean, Telluride's like Aspen, except it's a little bit more subtle, but I'm curating all of these brands that don't have a retail presence. There's not a tremendous amount of retail in Telluride, although there's quite a bit of concentration of wealth. And I just said give me your most over the top apres-ski look or ski suit because people, if they have access to it, they'll wear it. And it's fun. We all need to have fun. Clothes are a wonderful means to express oneself.
Cameron Silver:
Everybody has style. I don't care who you are, unless you're a nudist and if your style is letting it hang, that's your thing. But it's amazing that anybody who has the means to dress themselves and you can be in prison and wear a low rider pants and that becomes infiltrates popular style. We all have style. It's because we get dressed and some people's style is a stinky pit stain t-shirt and a pair of Levis with mud on it. And then that inspires someone else to do a deconstructed t-shirt and jeans are fabricated to look like that.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. That's kind of amazing. Thanks for expressing it that way. I have a friend who has a wonderful podcast called talk about talk, and we were talking about personal brand and how style and how we dress is just so important for people's personal brands. And yet, so few people take the time to curate it.
Cameron Silver:
I've always played dress up. I once said that if I wrote an autobiography, it would be called costume changes. We're all in drag. I think it was Ali MacGraw who said what's your drag? We were at the ethnic graphic show in Santa Fe. Do you want cowboy drag? Do you want native American drag? And I think we're all wearing a little drag. I mean, RuPaul said, we're born and then we're in drag. Isn't that RuPaul saying? It's more inherent to me. It's very natural, getting dressed. Like yesterday, I was working on an outfit to wear Saturday in Houston because I'm a ... And I'm not typically such a planner. Now it's starting to sound like I really calculated and manufactured, but I was going to go out for dinner at Soho House last night.
Cameron Silver:
And I figured I would kind of get a test run of variation of what I'm going to wear on Saturday. It'll change a little bit on Saturday. I just enjoy doing it. I love dressing for my environment as I mentioned earlier. I'm like, Zelig I will blend in at a certain point. I love that every place in the world has some regional style of dressing and I like learning about it. We live in a world that's very sensitive to cultural appropriation. And it's now in my PowerPoint, when I talk about the history of fashion, I show a photo of Frida Kahlo that was done in Vogue and I find it so influential, but is it cultural appropriation if you're wearing something folkloric like a skirt with embroideries and to me I just want to embrace and learn about these cultures. Some people use food, some people use ... Well, I mean, I like museums and art, but for me, my way to connect is through clothes.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Thank you. I understand what you're saying about the folkloric element, but I feel your energy and desire for connection and appreciation and discovery and that's kind of wonderful.
Cameron Silver:
Yeah. I mean, I think there's such a beautiful way for us to connect. It's a very sensitive topic, but I really connect with other cultures by the way they dress or their customs. I remember being in New Zealand and having an extraordinary experience with a Maori family and getting a piece of Pounamu their jade. And I treasure it because it was a cultural exchange and learning how you put your nose to each other. I love all of these traditions. My family by marriage is primarily Filipino so I grew up with a lot of Filipino culture. I grew up wearing a barong or eating Ponzi because people think I'm the tallest Filipino on the planet, but I don't have Filipino blood I just have a cultural connection to the Filipino people who are just extraordinary.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Thank you.
Cameron Silver:
They said united nations of fashion. Seriously, I'm going to run for president. We're going to bring everyone together.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's a lovely aspiration. I'm not in your country, but I'd vote for you for sure. I wanted to ask you just a couple of questions about retail, because you are very experienced and as you were mentioning with your extraordinary results with candid Cameron, you are very knowledgeable as well as to what your customer base wants. And you were mentioning to me that you've started doing a lot of trunk shows around the US on top of running your own store. And I remember reading in your interview in WWD that you said, "I'm a white glove experience for people. I've never tried to be everything to everyone." I was wondering if you could explore that for our listeners a little bit.
Cameron Silver:
Well, we must stay on brand. I curate these trunk shows that are mix of vintage and pre love from decades. And about 25 to 30 guest designers from around the world, mostly independent. I try to focus on female as many minority, female owned businesses and all with a sustainable component. However, it's expanding that more traditional luxury brands want to interface because I'm getting it in front of the consumer in an unexpected way. I mean, Telluride will be an interesting test because I'm working with some major, major luxury brands, but I'm curating it. I have a point of view. Now, granted, I have to provide the right things for the community I'm going to, and I try to explain this to my staff at Decades. I don't know why I'm saying y’all so much because of the time I was spending in Texas. I think y’all is the best word ever.
Cameron Silver:
But just because you only like early nineties or early aughts doesn't mean that's the only thing we can have in the store. We have to have something for our client base. It's a fine line. We need to shape shift to where we're going, but there always has to be a point of view. It's all about the edit. I cannot sell anything I don't like that. That is the way it works. I like a lot of stuff. Which is nice. And I also can understand how something will be relevant to a client in a certain part of the world. I was having an argument with Jared who's worked for me for 23 years who's like a legend. And I have all of these vintage Aloha shirts. He's like, "Yeah's a Aloha shirt. This is so not Decades."
Cameron Silver:
I said, "We don't just have to sell Chanel and Dior. They're beautiful vintage Aloha shirts." They are so inspirational for brands like Valentino and Saint Laurent who are playing around with Aloha print. These are the original ones. And when you're in Hawaii, kind of nice to get a vintage Aloha shirt, or if you're in Palm Beach and you're like this cute young woman, you get one, you put it on over a little bra top. I make it look relevant to the Decades DNA, but I can't cater to everybody. I think a lot of the biggest challenge with this pre loved world and this circular economy and all of these websites, none of which are profitable that keep getting VC money thrown into them. And they have to do a million transaction is that they're trying to be everything to everybody.
Cameron Silver:
You got to edit. You got to make it easy for the consumer. And I think a lot of people don't understand that. And that's why the great retail stores, I love the Webster, the Webster does a beautiful job curating. Maxfield does a really good job in Los Angeles. These stores or the Chapmans did such a great job when they were in charge of everything with matches or Browns. They were personality driven businesses that catered to a clientele who wanted that point of view. That's my advice to retailers, stop throwing spaghetti on the wall. Not everybody has to love what you do. You might have something for everybody, but educate them, take them up and show them the light.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Thanks. I really, really enjoy that. You made it around the edit. But you also said something super interesting. You talked about being a shapeshifter and earlier this week, I was learning about the importance of having a flexible brain. I'm studying on the side. It's contemplative psychology.
Cameron Silver:
Wow. You were always smart though. You've always been way too smart for fashion.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's just but a pin in that. But it's very interesting because I was reading that adaptability is something that we often don't consider as an essential trait that we need if we want to thrive, not just now, but thrive into the future.
Cameron Silver:
I mean, it's how we became a species. A human species is we have to shape shift and survive. And shapeshifting means lots of things. I have to interact with people with whom I don't often have the same political affiliation, but I can arrive at that place where we are connected. And we are again, the united nations of fashion. It just we live in such a divisive world. It's so disheartening, but we have to be able to amuse each other and tease each other in a loving way. But I realize not everybody thinks the way I think, and that's okay. That's what makes the world more interesting, but I can find where we are similar and not focus on just where we are different.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yes. I was just listening to Trevor Noah a little bit earlier, who was talking about the Spotify Joe Rogan feud, and he was making the same point. You can disagree and still have a conversation with someone. And that's something that I feel we are getting less and less good about.
Cameron Silver:
It's terrible. I mean, they talk about how DC used me that you would go, there would be some Joanne or society figure would host a cocktail party or a dinner party and all of these different fractions of political parties. But we really only have two in the states, but different people would get together and break bread. Now in the 21st century, we're not going to eat bread but we're going to break crew to take together or something. Well, in DC, you can eat bread because that's Hollywood broadly people, but it's so important. And that's one thing I really love to do. This summer I'm going to have a residency in Sag Harbor, and we're going I'll be doing a popup and every week there'll be a different luxury brand that will set up and do a curated experience.
Cameron Silver:
We're going to have dinner parties and salons. And I want people to get together granted it's the Hampton so there's a lot of sameness, but I love bringing different people together. I like uncomfortable situation. I mean, I don't want to say I like uncomfortable situations, but I don't mind the challenge. One of my biggest problems with Aspen Gay Ski is that there were too many gays. I need multiculturalism. I need different people around me. I thrive off of that.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. I don't believe that your type is the norm, but I am very similar to you. And I love, love, love, love multiculturalism, and the residencies in Sag harbor sound wonderful. When is that starting?
Cameron Silver:
So that will launch on the 15th of July with my friend opened a beautiful destination, Chris Coffee called Sage and Madison, and he has residency there. You can do these gorgeous, luxury, Airbnb apartments in this historic building. He's got a very chic barn store and then I'm going to have my popup there for, well, it's really more of a residence because it's for a minimum of a month, but it's going to be fantastic. We want to be the fashion destination in the Hamptons for the summer.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Ambitious, but I would expect nothing less from you. I'm sure you can make that happen.
Cameron Silver:
We're aiming high.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah, absolutely. There's one thing that I wanted to touch on, which I feel like I've heard you tell me in the past that you were also teaching in and around fashion history, is that correct?
Cameron Silver:
Yes. I've been broadened quite often to either do mentorships for students to talk about fashion history. My favorite thing to do is work with graduating classes and work one on one with the students to help them articulate, not with emojis, but with words and feelings what their design is. And I think one of the challenges for younger people now is that they just don't know how to communicate, but we still live in a world where to get a job, even if it's on a Zoom, you still have to do an interview. The one thing I've really observed, sometimes the most talented student doesn't get the job it's the most engaging. Sometimes when I'm with these students and somebody's done a beautiful senior collection, they can't communicate it. I really enjoy working to help a student find the words and the emotion and the references to be able to get a job or meet an editor or meet a buyer.
Cameron Silver:
Because if you don't have that ability, it's really, really difficult. Fashion design, in general, most creative director gigs, it really is casting. Every so often you have the magic that it's an Elbaz, who's got the talent and the charm or Karl Lagerfeld who has the talent and the sketching and the vision, but also knew how to give a good ‘bon mot’ to press. For those brands that do not do that, that are giving jobs to creative people who might be talented, but who don't have that extroverted quality it's extremely challenging to break through the noise. They have to be really, really talented. And you have to have such a major social media game.
Cameron Silver:
And it's hard to engage with the wealthier, more mature client who wants that connection, who doesn't just want to live virtually. I think for people like me in my position who can navigate and be like a glue in so many aspects, there is a demand. I mean, I'm not a fashion designer. But I can help put it all together and most important communicate it to the exterior because without that it really hard. I think there's very few brands that have major success without a personality behind their brand. I mean, like you work with Christian for all those years. I mean, he has a personality.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. But also I think that Christian made a conscious decision. He's actually more introverted than extroverted, but he chose to be that extrovert and that spokesperson for his brand, because he knew that this is something that his clients wanted because, guess what, she worked retail. He worked in his own store. He had direct experience with what people wanted. And so he did throw himself on the stage to make success of his passion.
Cameron Silver:
Yes. And I think that's such an incredible example. That's why I always tell people like work retail, work retail. Your thing means nothing. Your design means nothing until you get it on a body and not just a model or an actress, you get it on someone who actually paid for it. Learn why he or she is buying it. Retail is such an important part of education. And the beginning of the pandemic, when we all thought brick and mortar like, oh, it's over, it's over. I was like, "Oh my God, I own this building on Melrose that no one's going to want it. It's going to be a senior living facility." And it's back in a bigger way than ever brick and mortar. Now, all of these brands that emerged in the pandemic that were online only now they're opening and mortar because you've got to communicate. You've got to tell that story. It's very difficult to create an emotional experience virtually.
Anne Muhlethaler:
And it's also because people are a little bit sick and tired of looking at their screens.
Cameron Silver:
Yes. And I was giving this example. I was told this example and I've appropriated that shopping online is a little triggering right now. It's really reminiscent of the darkest days of the pandemic when you couldn't do anything. I think that this notion of multi-channel retail that I think is going to grow of, you can't just slap stuff up online anymore. There's got to be context. You've got to create content. You've got to story tell. Because the return rates are also enormous. The more education you can give a client, the more success you have to making it be a transaction that actually concludes successfully.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Transactions. As you're speaking, I am connecting in my mind to a couple of younger designers that I've worked with, or I'm currently working with. I would love to hear if you have any other advice to impart on anyone who wants to put out an independent brand and who has sustainability and the wellbeing of people in the planet in mind as well.
Cameron Silver:
Well, first and foremost, I think it is a great moment to be an independent, I think, conglomerate fashion, although it's attractive and has power. But I have found that most of my most verified clients are desperate for discovery. They want something nobody else has. That woman who has 40 Birkin bags, she's like, "Find me the niche bag that's $800 that's independently done." There's attraction to that. It's a good moment to be independent. Certainly it's the sustainability factor is paramount. I do not think any brand can look at successful longevity without having a pivot in mind to have sustainability become part of their mandate. And for those independent designers, I mean, you do have the beauty of social media and all of these things to get things out there, but make us laugh, entertain us, give us infotainment, which I think is such an interesting term.
Cameron Silver:
But infotainment goes back to what we initially talked about with storytelling. At the end of the day, the product has to be good, but you've got to be able to communicate that product to the customer. Be vulnerable, which is something that I have learned. Vulnerability is super powerful. Now I sound like Brene Brown and her podcast. And I always say vulnerability is not about crying on cue, but tell me a little story. Let me get to know you a little better. Let me love you. We all want to fall in love a little bit with a designer, and we all want to be the one to discover, this is my new best friend, look at this brand. Celebrate that.
Cameron Silver:
And there are a lot of organizations that are emerging. I'm very interested in fashion trust, which is providing money for independent designers because we need the independence. Not everything going to be a conglomerate. Not everything could be logofied. Not everything can be like a hoodie. We need that creativity in a sense that couture sensibility and by couture sensibility, I'm not saying you have to make a $250,000 gown, but artisanal, all of that, handy work, all of that is so attractive to people right now. We want to touch something that makes us feel something.
Anne Muhlethaler:
It's the ultimate shopping experience. When you find something you touch it, you're like, "Oh, my gosh." And you have that sense of wanting appropriation. And actually I'd say even a certain sensuality.
Cameron Silver:
Oh, completely. I was talking to the kids last night, all the 24-year-old and was like, "What's it like to date as a 24-year-old during a pandemic?" I mean, it's so weird with all of these apps, how do you meet people and connect with people? It's very similar with clothes. There's such a magic of touching something. I go into a store touching, touching. My hands are clean. I don't have hot chocolate or fudge all over them, but we have not been able to replicate that virtually, which is why these little popups I do of these independent brands and get it in front of these verified clients in places like Sarasota and Palm Beach and Memphis and Houston, it's very valuable to these designers because then they become, if they don't have storefront or lots of retail distribution, they become online customers. I've helped them build the connection.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's so precious. That's really, really important for so many of them. I wanted to pivot the conversation and I wanted to talk a little bit about your dad, Jack B. Silver.
Cameron Silver:
Yes.
Anne Muhlethaler:
He passed away in October, 2020, all my condolences again to you and your family.
Cameron Silver:
Thank you.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I was very, very touched about how honestly you spoke about the really hard times that you went through together. And the end of life care that you provided him. And something really resonated when I reread your post actually yesterday and tears came to my eyes immediately. Something that really touched me as well is how you were honest as how you found it very hard to take care of yourself while you were providing that care for him.
Cameron Silver:
Oh yes.
Anne Muhlethaler:
And I was wondering if you'd speak to that a little bit, because it felt like such a heartfelt, profound, honest thing to tell other people about. Because I find that we don't really talk about death, we don't talk a lot about grief. I think we all often shy away from the more difficult subjects.
Cameron Silver:
We're so shy.
Anne Muhlethaler:
We're all going to go through it.
Cameron Silver:
Especially my family. We don't talk about anything. It's like the worse fear mentality. Losing a parent during the height of the pandemic was extremely difficult and extremely challenging because hospitals were scarier or healthcare workers. But I became my father's primary caretaker. We did hospice at home. It was super challenging because for my mother, it was very difficult for her to accept what was going on and very easy to go into your safe place. And for me, I just more or less stopped eating. I was getting emaciated. Because it wasn't just my father, it was the pandemic, it was fearful of my business. It was so much uncertainty going around and I couldn't see the light. I was morbidly depressed. It's probably the most important thing I've ever done. And it haunts me and it's what I really want write about. And there's times where I thought, God, I didn't do such a good job, but I did the best I could during the worst circumstances. It would've been so much easier without a pandemic.
Cameron Silver:
Imagine how fearful we were of anyone coming to the house. I wasn't sleeping, wasn't eating. I wasn't even drinking that much water, all the things you have to do when you're getting depressed, which is eat well, drink water, exercise therapy, take meds. I just was like fighting it, making myself worse and worse. It was extraordinarily challenging. I was talking last night with a friend who lost her grandfather at the height of the pandemic. And my situation, this was about a five month hospice situation. It was a long time. And it was really the last week it's a horrible, it seems so inhuman as the medicine gets removed and you stop with the food and eventually the liquids, but at the same time, it is the most beautiful thing you can do because my father wanted to be home and he wasn't alone.
Cameron Silver:
And hospitals are kind of shield us from this. And my friend made a really good point. And he said, years ago, this is how it just happened. If someone got sick, you were at home and you took care of that person. In more recent times, the hospitals took care of them. I think the greatest gift you can give anybody at that stage of life is to try to lead them to the next stage which is death. But I hope no one has to do it through a pandemic again. I mean, it was really, really difficult. And I didn't take care of myself and I wanted to write about it because I was suffering tremendously. I was skinny and I got through it because it was really dark. It was really, really, really, really a difficult time.
Cameron Silver:
But I made it through and I am grateful that I was able to be there for my father. Did I ever think I would change his diapers or things like that growing up? No, but it's what I needed to do. And circumstances, if there had not been a pandemic and all of these horrible things that happened, I probably would've not been able to provide in the same way. I am grateful for that. I think anyone who's going through a really dark time, someone had mentioned that they were having a very difficult time six months ago and I just said, just talk to me because I went through it. I thought there was no light at the end of the tunnel and I made it through.
Cameron Silver:
And again, this is about being vulnerable. It's made me more of an authentic person and which is kind of ironic in the world of fashion, which seems so frivolous and presentation in reality. I've made great friends and have had serious conversations with people with tremendous depth. And I think great creative people have to be emotionally connected and vulnerable because you have to dig into that deep space of creativity, which is other worldly to create things.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. That's such a beautiful point. I believe that you are right and the greatest difficulty I find is depending on how anyone going through a tough time is internalizing and whether or not they've learned to speak or not speak about needing help is what could lend them in further darker times.
Cameron Silver:
Oh yeah. You spiral, it gets worse and worse. I mean, our minds trick us. I've done the work since probably not enough work I should probably be in daily therapy. If I see someone having a mini crisis, a mini breakdown. They've lost their phone and it's the end of the world or these little things that can spiral us. I can objectively hopefully let them see the objectivity in the same way that I'm less triggered by things that in the past would've bothered me, and then you get triggered, so then you react and then it gets ugly. I think I'm a better person for going through what I did, but I had a more or less break down, but that's what we all have to do to sort of get to our authentic selves.
Cameron Silver:
I'll be doing this forever and ever. I come from a family that is extremely emotionally disconnected, very anti therapy. I always say, how are the only Jewish family that they Woody Allen films, but hate therapy. Not introspective. The coping mechanisms is to conceal and I can't live like that. And I don't think anyone should have to live like that. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to share. And I really saw who my great friends were. I mean, my friends who kind of knew what was going on, they were amazing. And I never forget the day my dad died. He died early in the morning on 10/10/20. That afternoon, my friend Jennifer, who had been such a rock star for me, it's like academy award nominated actress, and it's a pandemic.
Cameron Silver:
And she had all of this food delivered because she knew I wasn't eating. And I had another friend Lizanne who cooked for me and another friend Amber who made soup for me. These little small gestures were very grand to me. And I can't thank these friends enough for recognizing, and I had a small circle who got me through, but we couldn't even see each other because we were scared we were going to kill each other.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yeah. Well, I'm really happy that you were able to make it through. You know that the podcast that is at the crossroads between business and mindfulness and what I mean by mindfulness is anything that is supporting us to find balance in whatever form. I'm wondering, what do you rely on?
Cameron Silver:
Well, after my dad died, it was really bad for me. I mean, I took a month to really be with other people going through an extremely difficult time. And I became great friends with somebody. And I then spent five months with her in Boulder beginning of last year. And we just supported each other. Boulder's magical. The sun was shining even when it was cold and we ate well and we exercised and I got my mojo back, but I had a partner in doing that, which was really a great, great friendship was developed. I needed to be in service of someone else who was also in service to me so we could communicate honestly. And I pray, not a religious person. And I don't always do. It's like last night I remembered to. Just a little time for spiritual practice.
Cameron Silver:
My spiritual practice was very broken and it's like having a sense of purpose was really important because my sense of purpose for quite some time was my father and then that was gone. She's like, "Oh my God, I have no sense of purpose. And there's a pandemic and it's like, I'm going to lose everything." And then I started to see the light and that's how this whole new traveling trunk show thing started. And it fed off what I needed interaction with people, I'm such a people person. The first 10 weeks of the pandemic, I was by myself in Westchester, Pennsylvania, not even in my home so it was very dark and then come back to LA and there's riots and then my father's dying.
Cameron Silver:
I mean, it was such a shit show. But then there's always a light and there's always a sense of purpose sometimes. I pretty much hit as close to rock bottom as I could. I need to get back to that person I was at the beginning of last year, which was working a spiritual practice, exercise being in service to others. But the biggest thing that happened is I lost my sense of humor during the darkness and I thought I would never get it back. I remember watching the Borat film, I could barely laugh and that film was funny as hell. I'm sure I was malnourished because I wasn't eating and this is in Oregon.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Oh, thank you so much for sharing that. I do agree with you a spiritual practice, whatever form it takes for some people is just communing with nature. And you were in a beautiful place getting fresh air, connecting with the sun and being connected to people.
Cameron Silver:
Yeah. I mean, for example, after this, I would take my little dog, Gary for a walk. Gary, he's lying down. Gary's lying down. He is 15 now.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I read that.
Cameron Silver:
We'll go for a little walk. Not a great walk, but I need to be outdoors. I mean, especially 10 weeks of being indoors at the start of the pandemic. I mean, it was brutal. And my story is probably one story that could be repeated millions of times over. I'm fortunate that I had people around me who knew what was going on and really helped me get through it and now I'm fabulous.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yes you are. And so before I ask you a couple of my closing questions, I wanted to make a connection because one of the things that helps me be the most balanced in my life is yoga. I actually think I'm a much nicer person when I practice yoga. Not that I'm a nasty person, I'm just better all round. And so randomly, we both love and know the phenomenal Diana Rilov, yoga teacher extraordinary. Can you tell me how you met her and tell me about your yoga practice.
Cameron Silver:
We met because I used to live the first year of my gig in New York. I lived on 73rd between Madison fifth. And went to Exhale to take her class. And we just became fast friends. Diana's just an extraordinary life affirming person. At the start of the pandemic I was doing her class, the group class, I was getting so dark I couldn't even do it. And she knew what was going on. And she's just an amazing human being. And I had a really good yoga practice for the first six months of last year, but I got lazy and I need to start doing it again. But for those who don't know Diana Rilov, she is just this amazing teacher and soul and her classes are great. And she teaches online, but you don't feel like it's online. I can't say enough about her and you've gone to her retreats.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I have. I lived around the corner from Equinox in the West Village. I went to maybe six or seven of her classes on a Sunday morning. And I knew I was moving out of New York City. And she said I'm doing this thing in Tuscany. And I went, "Okay, I'm in." And she was like, "It was one of the boldest things that any student of mine has ever done," because she's like, "Why would you come? You barely even know me." And she's a very close friend of mine and I'm doing her retreat this summer in Tuscany as well in June. I'm so excited.
Cameron Silver:
How nice. That's amazing.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Yes. This time I can drive down. I'm very happy about that.
Cameron Silver:
How long will it take you to get there?
Anne Muhlethaler:
I think probably eight hours from Geneva. Not bad. It's all right. Quick questions to close if that's okay.
Cameron Silver:
Yes.
Anne Muhlethaler:
First is what is your favorite word? And by that, I mean a word that you would accept to have tattooed on yourself, at least for a while.
Cameron Silver:
Chic.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I love that. What's one thing that makes you happy or satisfied or brings you joy.
Cameron Silver:
Oh, when my little Gary does his business in the morning. It sounds so silly, but it is, it's like this is my baby and he's to know that everything's working. God, does that sound insane?
Anne Muhlethaler:
No, it doesn't. I have an elderly cat and I understand.
Cameron Silver:
Yeah. It's like, okay, it's going to be a good day.
Anne Muhlethaler:
What secret superpower do you have?
Cameron Silver:
Oh gosh. I'm so powerless. Glut me. I don't know. I really don't have one. I don't know. What's yours? Am I allowed to ask?
Anne Muhlethaler:
I've never thought about it. Secret superpower. I could say my memory. I have a really, really good memory.
Cameron Silver:
I wish my memory were better. I just don't know. You know what it is, I think my secret power is I'm Switzerland. I can get along with everybody.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That is definitely a super power. And thanks for bringing my country into the mix.
Cameron Silver:
Yes.
Anne Muhlethaler:
What is your favorite sound?
Cameron Silver:
Oh, my favorite sound. I mean, I kind of love the sound of the surf in Malibu, although I'm not a huge beach person it's just such a beautiful sound.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Lucky you, you're close by.
Cameron Silver:
Not close enough.
Anne Muhlethaler:
What is one of the most embarrassing moments of your life that you can share with us?
Cameron Silver:
I wish I could tell you this story. To me, my embarrassing moments are when I run into somebody and I have no idea who they are. And I can't figure it out for days. I mean that like, who is this person? Oh God, that happened once in Paris on Rue Rivoli, I ran into Giambattista Valli and he is with this guy and this guy goes, "Cameron, how are you?" I had no idea who it was, no idea for days. And then I realized who the editor was, but I just was so dumbfounded. And actually it happened quite recently again, I was at the two by two gala in Dallas and this woman comes up to me, gives him Cameron you're here. I had no idea who it was because she had completely changed her hair. That's where it happens a lot for me. And I know a lot of people. Oh God, the art of that is just the worst. I hate that.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's a solid difficulty. I find that the hardest thing is when it's out of context, when you take them out of the environment that you know them in. That makes sense. What is a favorite book of yours?
Cameron Silver:
Favorite book, I wish I were a better reader. Oh, Mysteries of Pittsburgh which Michael Chabon that I read years ago. I just remember loving that book.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Wonderful. And then I'm going to close with my favorite question. And my favorite question is related to a mindfulness workshop that I was doing a couple of years ago.
Cameron Silver:
Mindfulness is so hard. It's such a great thing, but it is hard.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I know. Believe you I know. But the practice is really what matters, not the result.
Cameron Silver:
Right.
Anne Muhlethaler:
This question that I love that I close all my interviews with is what brings you happiness?
Cameron Silver:
I would say very simple things. A Sunday morning watching the morning new shows perusing the New York Times online next to somebody I am fond of drinking coffee or a home cooked meal at someone's house does not have to be a lab. It can be Mac and cheese, but those very simple things in bigger ways I love to travel. I love to travel so much. You put me on an airplane, I love it. But really it's like, I'd say one of my favorite joys and I always tell people who want to do so something for me, don't have to buy me anything. Don't have to do anything, cook dinner at home. I'm not a gore mall. I have very simple food tastes. Just toss a salad and a piece of grilled chicken or salmon. Very, very simple. But that really brings me joy. Because I think the most lovely thing you can do is bring someone to your home and feed them. It's food. It's feeding, it's nourishing someone. I guess like nourishing my body and my soul is a really nice thing to do.
Anne Muhlethaler:
You're reminding me of my dad. He used to joke with my brother that there was so much food on the table when we came around on Sunday night for dinner and that it was his way of showing love. So we used to say there's a lot of love on the table. I think that's probably something that is also expressed in what you're saying with friends, right?
Cameron Silver:
Yes. So much so. And again, nothing has to be elaborate. It doesn't have to be beautiful place sitting. Just simple. I mean simple things bring me a lot of pleasure. Sure, extravagant things do also but those simple moments. I always say that time is the most valuable gift you can give someone. If someone's willing to invite to their house and cook for me and have a conversation with me, there's no agenda. It's just being together. It's very old school, very old fashioned.
Anne Muhlethaler:
That's wonderful. Thank you so much. Cameron, thank you so much for your time for doing this interview. If people would like to find you or connect with you, where could we send them to you?
Cameron Silver:
My personal Instagram is at Cameron Silver. It's C-A-M-E-R-O-N Silver, S-I-L-V-E-R. And you can also visit me at Decades, Inc. D-E-C-A-D-E-S I-N-C, which is my store. And I replied it everybody's DM more or less, although I get a lot of creepy ones, but they're kind of fun. That can bring me pleasure too.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Thank you so much again. I hope that you have a wonderful rest of the day. I'll put all of the links to things we've talked about and the store and your Instagram in the show notes. And so thanks again and hopefully I'll see you in person soon and perhaps I'll get a chance to cook for you if you come to Europe.
Cameron Silver:
I would love that. All right. Great to see you.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Great to see you too.
Cameron Silver:
Now I got to go to work. All right.
Anne Muhlethaler:
Of course. Ciao!
Thanks again to Cameron for being my guest on the show today. You can find him online @cameronsilver.com on Instagram at Cameron Silver, which I highly recommend you follow. And you can also find Decades on Instagram at Decades, Inc and plenty other links on there. So friends and listeners, thanks again for joining me today and for links to the topics that we covered in the episodes, you can head over to the show notes. If you'd like to hear more, please go to your favorite podcast app and hit the subscribe button and you can leave me a review.
Anne Muhlethaler:
I love to hear from you. If you want to connect, please get in touch with me @Annvi on Twitter @Annvi on Instagram or Anne Muhlethaler on LinkedIn. You can also follow @_outtheclouds on Instagram, where I like to share some thoughts and musings on mindfulness and some guided meditations. You can find all of the podcast episodes, the show notes, my projects at outofthecloud.com and you can sign up to receive some email updates about all the fun things I am doing. That's it for this episode. Thank you so much for listening to Out of The Clouds. And I hope that you'll join me again next time until then be well, be safe. Take care.